Yesterday seemed to be a day of memories about the girl I used to be. The girl I was when I got pregnant at 18 and decided to make a life with my son's father. We had another little one a year later. As I was talking yesterday about different stories from those days it amazed me that I had no fear of how my life would turn out. I just figured it was meant to be and life would unfold as it should.
A few years later I left their father and became a single mom and still that young girl I was just took this as a challenge and forged ahead. I wonder what ever became of that girl that was so full of life and wasn't scared of these huge challenges. I would like to find that girl again and add her to the woman I have become.
The woman I have become worries about her kids futures and if she gave them enough love and support for them to have good futures. I wonder why they are not eager to go out on their own and find their own adventures. I look at them and wonder how I ever survived all that I had thrown at me at such a young age but that girl hadn't lost love or had her heart broken so I guess she was still naive to how cruel the world can be.
The woman I am proud to be has taken all those life lessons and tried to turn them into just that life lessons and am moving forward and becoming strong again.
Doing something new or hard when you don't realize just how hard or scary it will be isn't really being brave.
ReplyDeleteFully understanding everything you have to lose and doing the hard and scary things ANYWAY... that's true courage. And that's you today.