True meaning of Christmas

This year I have learned that the true meaning of Christmas is in our actions not just words. As I was taking my kids all over the place tonight to see their dad and his side of the family with not a complaint but actually a gladness in my heart I realized this was showing them the true meaning of Christmas.

It is about Jesus and his birth but also about family and love. I hope by making sure my kids could get to their dad's tonight and be the one to drive so we still had a part of Christmas Eve I showed them that.

I also noticed today as I handed out a small token of thanks to my coworkers knowing their would be nothing in return how good it felt to see each of them smile and the thanks I got from each of them was amazing.

My heartsister knows what a time I am going through this year and she went ahead and got me a little pick me up and it is so appreciated.

I realized this year that as one friendship is changing others are growing and even better some are rock solid. I am so loved and blessed.

Christmas Time

Wow I can't believe that Christmas is just two days away. I am so excited this year since I will be spending the next two days with new and old friends.

I was amazed at how important it was for my older kids to find time to do Christmas with me I figured that at their age spending time with the family would not be high on their list of things to do over Christmas.

Next week I am taking some time to myself then I have two days with Ethan just the two of us hanging out and being goofy it will be so nice and so needed.

We have had such a crazy and stressful last few months that it is going to be nice to spend Christmas with those I love and remembering the true reason for Christmas then take some me time to hide and watch movies.

I only have one Christmas wish and that is for my BFF to let me know what is going on so we can fix it and get back to being the friends we are meant to be. I am very thankful for my heart sister she has been such a rock this Christmas season as I have been trying to figure out what happened with my BFF.

Merry Christmas to all and I am sure I will be writing a lot over the next week since I will have a computer.

Loving Angel

Today was an amazing day. One of those days you hope you will remember when you are 90.

We went to Aunt Sheilas to have a multi purpose party.

1 - Celebrate her son's return from Afghanastan
2 - Celebrate her birthday
3 - Celebrate Christmas

So off we went to visit the clan and I was told their was a time sensitive surprise waiting for me.

When we got to Aunt Sheilas without getting lost which is a miracle in itself I found out that my surprise would only be me and Tasha. This right here was awesome since we don't get time together very often. Well she decided to take us to get our nails done and I tell you I so needed it and we gabbed for the whole hour.

When we got back to the house my cousin Julie and her two boys were there. This woman is amazing to me. Her oldest son has many physical and mental challanges yet she doesn't ever show that it bothers her. Tonight she had to leave early because her oldest was having a bad day but without a complaint she just packed up her boys and went home. At least I had a small visit with her.

Then we had supper and when it was time to clean up the dishes my Aunt Claire, Tasha and I went to it. Well I have never laughed so hard in a long time. We ended being like three silly school girls tell dirty jokes and just caring on.

I also got to have a long and good chat with my cousin Toni who I never get to see anymore since we are all so busy. Of course I aslo found out how Aaron was doing with being home and to see if he had any big plans and at this point he doesn't.

I also loved watching Ethan attach himself to Tasha and just follow her around and help her. I am so blessed to have such close family relations I never had the opportunity to pass this on to my older boys but I am hoping to pass this on to Ethan.

We also reminisced about our big adventure up north last christmas and that although the reason for the trip was not good the trip itself was amazing.

I got to see Tasha's wedding dress which is a big deal because not many will see the dress before the big day so it is nice to be included in that elite group. I am so impressed that she is standing her ground about her big day. She is so happy and it is nice to see her and Larry making this commitment and moving forward.

Friend Good, Bad or other

Not sure if anyone reads my blog anymore but it is funny it still helps me sort out my thoughts and feelings so I keep blogging.

I used to think I was a good friend the kind that people liked to have in their inner circle (not boasting) but lately as I reflect over the amount of people that have come in and out of my life over the years I am starting to wonder if I am somehow to cause for all the people that have come in and out over the years.

I do believe that not all friendships are meant to last a lifetime but only a season but I find it hard to believe that all those friendships that have gone away were meant to only be a season.

I sometimes wish I could be visited by ghost of friends in the past so I can find out why the friendship really ended.

I guess lately I am also feeling like my bff no longer wants to be a bff she has not said so in words but certainly in her actions. I am trying to believe that she is just going through life and at some point things will go back to the same way but I am finding it harder and harder to believe. The real proof has been the last few weeks I have been going through stuff that she would normally have been right here helping me with instead she hasn't said boo. I have mentioned it to her so we could get together and hang out and she replied I should just stay home.

I have asked her what is wrong multiple times and I have tried asking my hubby who knows her well what is up but he doesn't want to get in the middle and she says there is nothing wrong. I am not sure how to proceed with this friendship we have been through to much for me to just walk away. I will continue to pray and hope things get better even if they are changing

Winter Driving

Well tonight I had my first winter driving experience and I was amazed at how well I handled it. I could hear my dad's voice in my head the entire time and he gave me some great advice and I was able to not be so nervous.

I am not looking forward to my drive to work tomorrow since the roads are supposed to be horrible but at least I have tonight under my belt and I will just take my time tomorrow and hopefully it won't be as bad as they are predicting.

This is the joys of driving in Ontario and I am determined not to be one of those drivers who won't leave thier house if even one snowflake falls. I mean if it is bad and I don't have to go out I won't but hopefully after this winter I won't be a scardy cat on the road.

Christmas Season

Life is so busy during the Christmas season between decorating, shopping, visiting and wrapping gifts that I think most people forget to stop and enjoy this magical time of the year.

I have been blessed this year to have my house decorated and presents bought. It was beautiful last night to read a story to Ethan in front of the tree. I have even put me time on my day planner so that I don't get too busy or over booked.

I love this time of the year the belief in Santa, the miracle of the birth of Jesus and the hopes for the upcoming year. What more could we ask for. I do realize that I am blessed with a job, family and some money but all of that aside this is just the best part of the year.

I have set myself a goal for next year based on a book I am reading (God Chick) and I am going to try to have a more positive attitude towards all aspects of my life. Less venting ( I hear my friends cheering) and if changes need to be made they will just get done.

Merry Christmas to all and I hope each of you gets to enjoy this time of the year and remember the reason for the season.