My BFF and heart sister ran away to my dad's this past weekend. It was a much needed break from reality. This trek away was different in many ways. We are all going through major life changes that we don't always feel like sharing so it was nice to ignore these changes for a few days.
I worry about the girls they both seem to have so much on their minds. I love them and would do anything to make life easier for both of them. This little trip was exactly what we needed. We bonded, laughed, relaxed and just enjoyed nature.
While away we saw a moose, some partridge, a wolf, a dog sled team practicing. This is just a few of the critters we saw. It was my birthday on Saturday and the girls managed to smuggle in presents and cupcakes to make the day complete.
My dad also made sure to spoil us by chauferring us around the backroads so that we could see nature and check out the neighbours critters. While checking out the neighbours critters we saw goats, chickens and some dogs.
I am so glad that we are able to get away for a few days a couple times a year. My dad does so much to make sure that we get the peace, rest and pampering we need for those few days.
I realized this weekend how blessed I truly am. My husband may be out of a job right now but I have two girls I can count on unconditionally, a father that knows how to make things better and an awesome family that do truly try to help out.
Have to go and get the youngest ready for bed but I will be back to blog in the next couple of days.
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Rollercoaster of life
The last few days have been a rollecoaster some good and some bad.
First on Friday my husband lost his job which in itself is bad enough since he makes the lions share of our income and has benefits.What makes it worse it that this was his dream job but the company decided it was not a good fit. I am sure we will be fine financially and he will find another job but the crushing of his dream may not heal as quickly.
Secondly I am now on four days a week without pay for that extra day. The good thing about this is that it is forcing me to start looking for something else and get me out of the comfort zone.
The best part was on Monday night we all went to the Keg for my birthday supper which my two older children paid for. I wish I had a camera to capture the look of pride they had that they were able to pay for supper for all of us. I don't know the cost of the bill but I am sure it was not cheap. It was so nice for all of us to be together just laughing and having a break from all the crap going on.
Last night I joined a step class with my BFF I didn't think I was out of shape until last night but apparantley I am. This class is going to force me to get out of the house and work out my frustrations in a positive way.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
First on Friday my husband lost his job which in itself is bad enough since he makes the lions share of our income and has benefits.What makes it worse it that this was his dream job but the company decided it was not a good fit. I am sure we will be fine financially and he will find another job but the crushing of his dream may not heal as quickly.
Secondly I am now on four days a week without pay for that extra day. The good thing about this is that it is forcing me to start looking for something else and get me out of the comfort zone.
The best part was on Monday night we all went to the Keg for my birthday supper which my two older children paid for. I wish I had a camera to capture the look of pride they had that they were able to pay for supper for all of us. I don't know the cost of the bill but I am sure it was not cheap. It was so nice for all of us to be together just laughing and having a break from all the crap going on.
Last night I joined a step class with my BFF I didn't think I was out of shape until last night but apparantley I am. This class is going to force me to get out of the house and work out my frustrations in a positive way.
Thanks for reading and commenting.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Lost love but hoping to find it
I heard this song today on the radio and loved the lyrics so I had to post them.
The song is The Love That We Lost by Chely Wright.
Going through old dresser drawers
Fumbling through there closets
It's got to be here somewhere
I know it's round here somewhere
Searching from room to room
We couldn't have just lost it
I know it's round here somewhere
It's got to be here somewhere
Maybe we packed it up with college books and winter clothes
Things we thought were in the way
Out of style or just outgrown
We didn't give it away
We just left it alone
We tried to find it one day
That's when we noticed it gone
I turned the house upside down
Praying I'd stumble across some sign thats it's still around
Got to find the love that we lost
Captured in old picture frames shinning in those faces
It used to be here somewhereI know it's still here somewhere
Reflected in our children's eyes
How could we misplace itI know it was here yesterday
How could it just slip away
it was more then just a box of junk we stored away to gather dust
This was a dream we thought we always could reach out and
The song is The Love That We Lost by Chely Wright.
Going through old dresser drawers
Fumbling through there closets
It's got to be here somewhere
I know it's round here somewhere
Searching from room to room
We couldn't have just lost it
I know it's round here somewhere
It's got to be here somewhere
Maybe we packed it up with college books and winter clothes
Things we thought were in the way
Out of style or just outgrown
We didn't give it away
We just left it alone
We tried to find it one day
That's when we noticed it gone
I turned the house upside down
Praying I'd stumble across some sign thats it's still around
Got to find the love that we lost
Captured in old picture frames shinning in those faces
It used to be here somewhereI know it's still here somewhere
Reflected in our children's eyes
How could we misplace itI know it was here yesterday
How could it just slip away
it was more then just a box of junk we stored away to gather dust
This was a dream we thought we always could reach out and
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Jekyll and Hyde
I just got home from the meet the teacher BBQ. I was such a proud mom to hear all the wonderful things everyone had to say about Ethan. He was so well behaved until I used that dreaded word "no". This wonderful happy child became this horrible temper tantrum screaming little person.
I have been listening to this lovely little one scream for 2o minutes interrupted by the lovely blackmail comments of if you let me go back to the school then I will stop crying. If you spend time with me then I won't yell at you.
I am always amazed at how quickly children can go from angels to temper tantrum screaming aliens. I have been living with this Jekyll and Hyde for about three weeks and I have lost all my patience and sympathy for this child.
I love him but I just so don't have the energy to deal with this side of him. If I am correct it will be an ongoing struggle all night and since this is new with him I am not really sure what else to do. I have grounded, consequenced, lectured and passed him off to my husband to deal with.
I try to remember that this will pass and I will have my happy, lovely boy back but I want a machine so I can fast forward to that point.
I have been listening to this lovely little one scream for 2o minutes interrupted by the lovely blackmail comments of if you let me go back to the school then I will stop crying. If you spend time with me then I won't yell at you.
I am always amazed at how quickly children can go from angels to temper tantrum screaming aliens. I have been living with this Jekyll and Hyde for about three weeks and I have lost all my patience and sympathy for this child.
I love him but I just so don't have the energy to deal with this side of him. If I am correct it will be an ongoing struggle all night and since this is new with him I am not really sure what else to do. I have grounded, consequenced, lectured and passed him off to my husband to deal with.
I try to remember that this will pass and I will have my happy, lovely boy back but I want a machine so I can fast forward to that point.
Sorry for all the venting but I figured this was the best outlet for my angst. Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Happy for my job but so bored
I am very grateful that I have my job and I do love the work that I do but lateley I am so bored at work. We are very slow and have even gone to a 4 day week. Even with that I still can not find enough work to fill my days.
I am a hard worker and I love to be busy. I hate sitting at my desk with nothing to do. I am trying to be positive that things will pick up soon and we will be back to 5 days a week and busy. The practical side of me thinks it might be time to look for another job because in this economy who can afford to be on a short week. The loyal part of me doesn't want to jump ship if this is just a small bump in the road.
The postive part of me having no work is that I have time to blog and read other blogs. I have read a lot of interesting stuff in the last two days. The other bonus is that I have had time to plan my bff's party this Saturday and get my list ready for next week when I runaway to my dad's with my heart sister and bff.
I guess I have survived the last few weeks of short weeks I can handle a few more.
I am a hard worker and I love to be busy. I hate sitting at my desk with nothing to do. I am trying to be positive that things will pick up soon and we will be back to 5 days a week and busy. The practical side of me thinks it might be time to look for another job because in this economy who can afford to be on a short week. The loyal part of me doesn't want to jump ship if this is just a small bump in the road.
The postive part of me having no work is that I have time to blog and read other blogs. I have read a lot of interesting stuff in the last two days. The other bonus is that I have had time to plan my bff's party this Saturday and get my list ready for next week when I runaway to my dad's with my heart sister and bff.
I guess I have survived the last few weeks of short weeks I can handle a few more.
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Have you seen that girl
Yesterday seemed to be a day of memories about the girl I used to be. The girl I was when I got pregnant at 18 and decided to make a life with my son's father. We had another little one a year later. As I was talking yesterday about different stories from those days it amazed me that I had no fear of how my life would turn out. I just figured it was meant to be and life would unfold as it should.
A few years later I left their father and became a single mom and still that young girl I was just took this as a challenge and forged ahead. I wonder what ever became of that girl that was so full of life and wasn't scared of these huge challenges. I would like to find that girl again and add her to the woman I have become.
The woman I have become worries about her kids futures and if she gave them enough love and support for them to have good futures. I wonder why they are not eager to go out on their own and find their own adventures. I look at them and wonder how I ever survived all that I had thrown at me at such a young age but that girl hadn't lost love or had her heart broken so I guess she was still naive to how cruel the world can be.
The woman I am proud to be has taken all those life lessons and tried to turn them into just that life lessons and am moving forward and becoming strong again.
A few years later I left their father and became a single mom and still that young girl I was just took this as a challenge and forged ahead. I wonder what ever became of that girl that was so full of life and wasn't scared of these huge challenges. I would like to find that girl again and add her to the woman I have become.
The woman I have become worries about her kids futures and if she gave them enough love and support for them to have good futures. I wonder why they are not eager to go out on their own and find their own adventures. I look at them and wonder how I ever survived all that I had thrown at me at such a young age but that girl hadn't lost love or had her heart broken so I guess she was still naive to how cruel the world can be.
The woman I am proud to be has taken all those life lessons and tried to turn them into just that life lessons and am moving forward and becoming strong again.
Sunday, September 12, 2010
What a weekend
Went to my dad's this weeekend for the annual party. What a blast the party was but there were many adventures along the way.
My dad lives in the country now he has no animals but all of his neighbours have farms. Yesterday as we were driving into town to get the party essentials we noticed that some of his neighbours were having a problem. We stopped to see what the problem was well it turned out that a three rams had got loose and had no intention of going back to their enclosure. So we got out and helped them put the rams back where they belonged. Once all this was done we went on our way to town.
Last night the party was amazing not only did good people show but also my cousin from Cambodia called. This was such an awesome surprise she had to get up at 6am and use a day's salary to call but she made sure she did it. Then my cousin Jennifer called to have a drink with us, she lives 24 hours away. At the end of the night I got to talk to my godfather and have a drink with him.
This morning I got up to find out that we had to help the neighbours move the cows from one pasture to another so off my dad and I went. It was so much fun to watch the cows get excited to have fresh grass and clover to eat.
Then the adventures were over and we had to return home to housework and laundry. At least I had an amazing weekend and made some new friends and rebonded with old ones.
My dad lives in the country now he has no animals but all of his neighbours have farms. Yesterday as we were driving into town to get the party essentials we noticed that some of his neighbours were having a problem. We stopped to see what the problem was well it turned out that a three rams had got loose and had no intention of going back to their enclosure. So we got out and helped them put the rams back where they belonged. Once all this was done we went on our way to town.
Last night the party was amazing not only did good people show but also my cousin from Cambodia called. This was such an awesome surprise she had to get up at 6am and use a day's salary to call but she made sure she did it. Then my cousin Jennifer called to have a drink with us, she lives 24 hours away. At the end of the night I got to talk to my godfather and have a drink with him.
This morning I got up to find out that we had to help the neighbours move the cows from one pasture to another so off my dad and I went. It was so much fun to watch the cows get excited to have fresh grass and clover to eat.
Then the adventures were over and we had to return home to housework and laundry. At least I had an amazing weekend and made some new friends and rebonded with old ones.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Proud of my cousins work in Cambodia
I just received the latest update from my cousin about all the work she is doing in Cambodia. I have listed the link below for anyone that might be interested.
http://abc-rice.com/
When she first left to go to Cambodia I thought girl I know you are flaky and do crazy things but how are we as a family going to come rescue you half a world away. This was my constant thoughts as it became clear she was not coming home soon.
Then she shocked me and probably most of my family by actually pulling off her dream of starting a school and helping the orphans. She got herself a small job so she could stay in Cambodia then she got the paperwork filed to become a proper charity so people can donate to the school.
You have to understand this girl had a habit of deciding to do things at the last moment and not think about the follow through or consequences of her crazy but fun choices. She has slept on my couch when she decided on the spur of the moment to live in Toronto so you can understand why I was worried. Well I am now one of her biggest supportors and so proud of her. I have never seen her look so calm and at peace. She has always searched for her place in this world and she has finally found it.
When I read all the sacrifices she has had to make. I see the pictures of the mattress she sleeps on. It amazes me and makes me stop and think about if I could make such sacrifices and truthfully there is no way I could commit to such hard work, little pay and horrible living conditions. As my cousin reminds me she gets paid in hugs, kisses and praise. She says that is all she needs to live on.
Again I must say how proud I am of her. I miss her like crazy but thank goodness we have facebook and e-mail to keep in touch
http://abc-rice.com/
When she first left to go to Cambodia I thought girl I know you are flaky and do crazy things but how are we as a family going to come rescue you half a world away. This was my constant thoughts as it became clear she was not coming home soon.
Then she shocked me and probably most of my family by actually pulling off her dream of starting a school and helping the orphans. She got herself a small job so she could stay in Cambodia then she got the paperwork filed to become a proper charity so people can donate to the school.
You have to understand this girl had a habit of deciding to do things at the last moment and not think about the follow through or consequences of her crazy but fun choices. She has slept on my couch when she decided on the spur of the moment to live in Toronto so you can understand why I was worried. Well I am now one of her biggest supportors and so proud of her. I have never seen her look so calm and at peace. She has always searched for her place in this world and she has finally found it.
When I read all the sacrifices she has had to make. I see the pictures of the mattress she sleeps on. It amazes me and makes me stop and think about if I could make such sacrifices and truthfully there is no way I could commit to such hard work, little pay and horrible living conditions. As my cousin reminds me she gets paid in hugs, kisses and praise. She says that is all she needs to live on.
Again I must say how proud I am of her. I miss her like crazy but thank goodness we have facebook and e-mail to keep in touch
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Party time
Looking forward to my weekend. I am going to my dad's for a yearly cornroast to celebrate mine and my cousins birthdays. It will be a very small gathering this year but I think that it is going to still be a blast and because it is small I will get to visit with everyone. Normally I just get to visit with a couple of people because it is so big and busy.
I can't believe the fall is already here and this time tomorrow night I will be at my dads getting ready for the party. I am now into my official party month. You see I strongly believe that birthdays and Christmas should be celebrated multiple times and stretched for as long as possible. My birthday is normally a month worth of celebrations with family and friends. This year looks to be a good one.
This weekend I am at my dads with extended family, then next week will be celebration with my kids and then to top of the month my BFF, Heart Sister and I are all going back to my dads for a girls weekend. I am told they are looking forward to me being unable to get my pj's on. This seems to be the highlight of our weekend away.
I can't believe the fall is already here and this time tomorrow night I will be at my dads getting ready for the party. I am now into my official party month. You see I strongly believe that birthdays and Christmas should be celebrated multiple times and stretched for as long as possible. My birthday is normally a month worth of celebrations with family and friends. This year looks to be a good one.
This weekend I am at my dads with extended family, then next week will be celebration with my kids and then to top of the month my BFF, Heart Sister and I are all going back to my dads for a girls weekend. I am told they are looking forward to me being unable to get my pj's on. This seems to be the highlight of our weekend away.
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
First day of school
I think I am one of the very few parents that does not get excited about the first day of school and does not take the day off of work. For me back to school means the start of routine and homework both things that I am not a fan of.
My youngest is in SK, so last year I understood dropping him off since it was his first year of school but today I dropped him at daycare and they took him to school. As I was reading facebook this morning I was shocked that almost all of my friends took the day off work to drop and pick up their kids from school.
I was actually starting to wonder if I was like the worst parent in the world for not taking the day off but then I picked up Ethan from daycare and he told me all about his day and how proud he was to be big enough to go to school without me. This made my day and I don't feel like the worst mother in the world.
I think it is great for all the parents that are able to have today off and have a great first day of school tradition but for me I have had a lot of time off this summer to hang out with Ethan and make memories and that is what I would rather use my vacation time for. I get the bare minimum at my work so I treasure the days I do get off.
Sorry if this is sounding more like a rant then a blog but I am way past my bedtime and so desperatley wanted to blog tonight since I have missed the last few.
My youngest is in SK, so last year I understood dropping him off since it was his first year of school but today I dropped him at daycare and they took him to school. As I was reading facebook this morning I was shocked that almost all of my friends took the day off work to drop and pick up their kids from school.
I was actually starting to wonder if I was like the worst parent in the world for not taking the day off but then I picked up Ethan from daycare and he told me all about his day and how proud he was to be big enough to go to school without me. This made my day and I don't feel like the worst mother in the world.
I think it is great for all the parents that are able to have today off and have a great first day of school tradition but for me I have had a lot of time off this summer to hang out with Ethan and make memories and that is what I would rather use my vacation time for. I get the bare minimum at my work so I treasure the days I do get off.
Sorry if this is sounding more like a rant then a blog but I am way past my bedtime and so desperatley wanted to blog tonight since I have missed the last few.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Why am I up
This is hopefully my last friday off of work (I say this because I will start being docked pay soon if we don't go back full time) and my husband just announced he is not going to work. This is wonderful news I get to sleep in and just relax but instead I am awake and just realized that he will be working around the house and so much for my quiet day with Ethan.
I will have to explain to my hubby that no loud banging or noise is aloud on these precious days. These golden days off of work with Ethan are to be treasured by watching tv, building forts, reading stories and just being lazy. Not only will we be back to work and school soon but he is also growing so fast that before you know it he will be too busy for building forts or snuggling. I am hoping not for a few years but we will see.
It will be interesting with my husband home. You see he does not view a day off the same as Ethan and I. Hopefully him being home will add to our day off not take away from it. I will be sure to blog tonight to fill you in.
It looks like it is going to be a gorgeous day maybe I will fill his pool and we can hang in the backyard. I can't believe this is the last long weekend of the summer. The weather is gorgeous thankfully.
I will have to explain to my hubby that no loud banging or noise is aloud on these precious days. These golden days off of work with Ethan are to be treasured by watching tv, building forts, reading stories and just being lazy. Not only will we be back to work and school soon but he is also growing so fast that before you know it he will be too busy for building forts or snuggling. I am hoping not for a few years but we will see.
It will be interesting with my husband home. You see he does not view a day off the same as Ethan and I. Hopefully him being home will add to our day off not take away from it. I will be sure to blog tonight to fill you in.
It looks like it is going to be a gorgeous day maybe I will fill his pool and we can hang in the backyard. I can't believe this is the last long weekend of the summer. The weather is gorgeous thankfully.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Yeah Dad is almost home
Wow I am so excited I finally have my computer all to myself and I can write my blog without rushing.
I am enjoying the sound of nothing for a change, I know I should be doing a million things like cleaning my house or doing laundry but I am drawn to my blog although I have no idea what to write about.
My dad and I are extremley close and he has been out of town for the last couple of weeks visiting family. I was getting updates via text message and facebook about where he was and what he was doing. Normally when he is away I have no way of contacting him or knowing what he is doing so this was neat.
I talk to my dad all the time but especially on Wednesdays so last night I get this text from my cousin asking where is my call it is Wednesday. I immediatley picked up the phone and called. It feels good to know that my dad misses me even when surronded by other family members.
This morning I got a text that he is on his way home I won't see him until next week but it is nice to know that by tomorrow night he will be only hours away not days away.
I reminded him that my girls weekend is coming up and we are running away to his house so he had to be home for that. He assured me that if he was not home he would send us plane tickets to Thunder Bay and then he would pick us up. He would not abandoned us on girls runaway weekend. Although Thunder Bay is nice I am glad that he will be home for our runaway weekend.
I am proud to say that my dad and I are very close and I hope to have this type of relationship with my children as they become adults.
I guess I found my topic for my blog
I am enjoying the sound of nothing for a change, I know I should be doing a million things like cleaning my house or doing laundry but I am drawn to my blog although I have no idea what to write about.
My dad and I are extremley close and he has been out of town for the last couple of weeks visiting family. I was getting updates via text message and facebook about where he was and what he was doing. Normally when he is away I have no way of contacting him or knowing what he is doing so this was neat.
I talk to my dad all the time but especially on Wednesdays so last night I get this text from my cousin asking where is my call it is Wednesday. I immediatley picked up the phone and called. It feels good to know that my dad misses me even when surronded by other family members.
This morning I got a text that he is on his way home I won't see him until next week but it is nice to know that by tomorrow night he will be only hours away not days away.
I reminded him that my girls weekend is coming up and we are running away to his house so he had to be home for that. He assured me that if he was not home he would send us plane tickets to Thunder Bay and then he would pick us up. He would not abandoned us on girls runaway weekend. Although Thunder Bay is nice I am glad that he will be home for our runaway weekend.
I am proud to say that my dad and I are very close and I hope to have this type of relationship with my children as they become adults.
I guess I found my topic for my blog
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Interloper
I must apologize before I write my blog that I have not been writing. Life got crazy but a good hectic so I had no chance to use the computer.
I have worked at my company for two years and thought wouldn't it be nice if I could have a lunch buddy since I have no one to even have break with. Then last week my coworker switched his lunch I thought this is great. It was great for the first few days but now I feel like he is interlopping on my lunch time and that I have to make conversation and be nice even when I just want to read my book or play with my ipod.
Don't get me wrong my coworker is great and we have great conversations I just dont't like the idea of sharing every lunch hour with someone. This is very different feeling for me I am a social butterfly and love to visit and chat with people. I am sure that this feeling will pass and I will begin to enjoy having a lunch buddy but for now it just feels strange.
Off to have lunch and see what conversation comes from it.
I have worked at my company for two years and thought wouldn't it be nice if I could have a lunch buddy since I have no one to even have break with. Then last week my coworker switched his lunch I thought this is great. It was great for the first few days but now I feel like he is interlopping on my lunch time and that I have to make conversation and be nice even when I just want to read my book or play with my ipod.
Don't get me wrong my coworker is great and we have great conversations I just dont't like the idea of sharing every lunch hour with someone. This is very different feeling for me I am a social butterfly and love to visit and chat with people. I am sure that this feeling will pass and I will begin to enjoy having a lunch buddy but for now it just feels strange.
Off to have lunch and see what conversation comes from it.
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